A significant piece of evidence in the Hinckley trial was the New Year's Eve monologue of December 31, 1980. John Hinckley spoke this to his tape recorder:
John Lennon is dead. The world is over. Forget it. It's just gonna be insanity, if I even make it through the first few days. . . . I still regret having to go on with 1981 ... I don't know why people wanna live.
John Lennon is dead. . . . I still think-I still think about Jodie all the time. That's all I think about really. That, and John Lennon's death. They were sorta binded together. . . .
I hate New Haven with a mortal passion. I've been up there many times, not stalking her really, but just looking after her. ... I was going to take her away for a while there, but I don't know. I am so sick I can't even do that. . . . It'll be total suicide city. I mean, I couldn't care less. Jodie is the only thing that matters now. Anything I might do in 1981 would be solely for Jodie Foster's sake.
is Jodie Foster. I've gotta, I've gotta find her and
talk to her some
in person or something. ... That's all I want her to
know, is that I
her. I don't want to hurt her. ... I think I'd rather
just see her not,
not on earth, than being with other guys. I wouldn't
want to stay here
on earth without her.
THE HINCKLEY TRIAL: EXCERPTS FROM SELECTED POEMS BY JOHN HINCKLEY